Trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, and the urge to check a partner’s phone can stem from various factors such as insecurity, past experiences, or a genuine concern for fidelity.
The act of checking your partner’s phone can have significant repercussions, influencing the dynamics and trust in the relationship.
Recently, during the trailer launch event of his upcoming film Khel Khel Mein, actor Akshay Kumar was asked whether his wife, Twinkle Khanna, checks his phone.
With technology becoming an integral part of our lives, the boundaries between privacy and transparency in relationships can often blur, leading to potential trust issues among couples. But Kumar revealed, “Mere parivar mein cell phone ka password kisi ko nahi pata. Toh wo khulega hi nahi (No one in my family knows my phone’s password. So it won’t open.)”
Trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship, and the urge to check a partner’s phone can stem from various factors such as insecurity, past experiences, or a genuine concern for fidelity.
So, is it acceptable for one partner to check the other’s phone in a relationship?
Gurleen Baruah, occupational psychologist and executive coach at That Culture Thing, mentions, “Generally, it is not acceptable for one partner to check the other’s phone in a relationship, even if they have permission. This issue is nuanced and involves several important factors to consider.”
Trust is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship, she states. Checking a partner’s phone undermines this trust and the natural leap of faith that partners take with each other. Privacy is essential, and invading these boundaries can cause lasting damage to the relationship.”
“Checking a partner’s phone can create a cycle of doubt and suspicion rather than alleviating it. This behavior often escalates, leading to increasingly invasive actions and higher levels of anxiety,” adds Baruah.
The habit of checking a partner’s phone can become an obsession, particularly if driven by conditions such as Relationship OCD (ROCD). This leads to a cycle of obsession, distress, and compulsion, significantly affecting both mental health and the relationship.
Open communication and clear boundaries are vital, Baruah asserts. Instead of snooping, partners should discuss their feelings of insecurity and work through them together. This approach fosters a stronger and more trusting relationship.
How can couples navigate issues of privacy and transparency?
Navigating issues of privacy and transparency is crucial for maintaining a healthy balance in a relationship. Here are some strategies couples can use:
Open Communication and Clear Boundaries: Establish open and honest communication to discuss expectations and boundaries regarding privacy and transparency. Agree on what information should be shared and what can remain private, ensuring both partners feel heard and understood.
Build and Maintain Trust: Work on building and maintaining trust through consistent, honest behaviour. Trust grows when partners feel secure and confident in each other’s actions and intentions. Address any concerns openly to prevent misunderstandings.
Respect Individual Space: Allow each other to have private moments and personal space without feeling the need to constantly check up on one another. Respecting individual space is essential for personal well-being and the health of the relationship.
Be Transparent About Feelings: Share your feelings and concerns with your partner. If you’re feeling insecure or anxious about something, talk about it instead of resorting to invasive actions like checking their phone. Transparency about emotions helps in understanding and addressing the root causes of insecurity.